If it's in your blood, you never grow out of it...

If it's in your blood, you never grow out of it….

Yet another blog entry that I feel am months late in posting. Really, it's only been about a month. Maybe a month and a half.

Back at the beginning of December, I got the chance to see Street Dogs at Reggie's. This was awesome for many reasons. The two most important being that Reggie's is my favorite venue in the city, and Street Dogs is one of my favorite bands on this earth.

Heading to a punk show alone (as usual) gives me a lot of to contemplate my life and the directions I've chased in my 31 years in the world. I almost always come to the same conclusion: I have no regrets.

I remember my first punk rock show. Less Than Jake at The Corral sometimes in 1995, or 1996. I was alone then too, having just split with my closest group of high school friends. I was a bit lost, feeling like I didn't fit in anywhere.

That show was a revelation. Here was a place that I could make friends effortlessly. A place where I wasn't that painfully shy, awkward teenager. Here was music that beat in time with my heart.

It's been almost 15 years since that show, and I find myself running with the same crowd. I have been ridiculed for listening to music that is so seemingly way out of date. I don't bring my friends with me, because they aren't into this like I am.

But standing there, watching some awesome Boston punk the same thing is true: This is the music that beats in time with my heart.

This "scene," this sound, really, is what's in my blood. It's been with me for 15 years. This is who I am.

A Night To Remember

What makes a good show?

A few months ago (I'm a little behind on my posting), I went to a show. I had been looking forward to this one for a while because I was going to see Mannequin Men. They are one of my favorite Chicago bands that no one's heard of (yet). Circumstances had kept me from seeing them for almost a year.

As is the case when something is built up in your head, the show was a bit of a disappointment. The weather had been awful that day, and an outdoor street show amidst a fall drizzle just does not sound like fun. There was no one there.

So the band was faltering, trying to get the crowds hearts into it. Nothing they were doing was helping… then a miracle happened.

This little kid materialized out of the crowd and just started getting down. He was serious about dancing, this kid. Not only that, but this insanely drunk lady kept coming and trying to dance with him--causing him to run away.

Something as little as that can turn a night--and a show--completely around. Which led me to ask my friends: What's your best memory from a show?

Here are their responses:
--Lolla 96- halfway through Metallica with a guy I'd met that day (who'd I eventually marry), the back clasp on the bikini top I was wearing BROKE and I was stuck hanging onto it for a long time before I found another shirt. Awkward.

--Hmm, could go a lot of directions here...I have to go with Boston in 1997, it was literally the 1st thing I did when I moved to Tempe, AZ, it was the day after I had arrived in town via flight. It was the 1st time in my life I was completely on my own (I'd made friends quickly in Houston and always had a roommate there, and my mom wasn't moving out there for several months). Not having a car, I had to take 3 busses across Phoenix to get to the concert. That night, during the show (which was excellent from my seat), there was a thunderstorm off in the distance, lighting up the desert sky in ways I'd never seen before. All things combined, it was an awesome night.

--When I went to see Menudo in 1993 with my cousins, my little sister and my mom. At the end, the crowed was pushing us out of the door and my mom lost my sister for a second and sward she would never take us to a concert again!

--Ozzfest 2001. I won the tickets from RVC for good grades. I was my first concert over the age of 18. While I regret who I was with, it was an experience that taught me I could be self reliant! Driving there without directions, imbibed on way too much...stuff, and had to get back home afterwards too. And by no means did I smuggle my ex-boyfriends hitter box in ;-)

--I was supposed to work overtime during the weekend but I took time off instead to go to a hardcore fest. I broke my pinkie finger while playing catch football when crappy bands were playing. When I went to work on Monday I found out there had been an explosion at the factory and two people were in the hospital. That's when I decided I better go back to school. I still think hardcore saved my life.

--A Static Lullaby, Senses Fail, and The Movielife at the Globe East in '03. It was the first of MANY concerts I'd go to with the woman who three years later I'd marry.

--Everything about going to The Fest back in 2009. Stepping off the plane from Ohio in gorgeous Tampa, stumbling into a hotel room of dudes still drunk from pre-Fest shows the day after, driving up to Gainesville, a 3:00 AM house show that so many people showed up to that it turned into an impromptu block party, Less Than Jake on Halloween, waking up "early" at 10 AM to see The Sidekicks, ditching Dillinger Four to see Anchor Arms play a set in a tiny dive bar, performances in the back of a tiny Cuban bakery... so much good stuff.
Also, house shows in high school and driving to KoC in Arlington Heights to see touring punk and hardcore bands. Way more impactful than any arena show.

And some of my own:

--Spending the day in the sun watching the BoDeans or some other terrible band at On the Waterfront in Rockford so we could see Gravity Kills for free that night. Cory sunburned his scalp and right in the middle of the show, Jeff reached off the stage to grab his poor head.

--A girl at a Fall Out Boy show being so mad at me for standing in front of her (even though I got there first and had every right to be in front of her) that she took everything out of my pocket and threw it on the floor. I almost lost my ID, credit card and cash that night.

--Meeting incredibly drunk cougars at the Train/Butch Walker show that wanted to take Eric home with them.

--Crying at an Unwritten Law show because my ex had committed some heinous offense, and having the Rave security guard offering to beat him up for me.

--The mini girl grabbing my friend Chris' crotch as he was singing at The Loft in Madison. Then later, drinking at the bar with him when she shows up. She keeps coming on to him and offering to make out with him. Chris hides behind me and says, "Here make out with Lindsey." And she's up for it.

--Knowing that if I walk up to my friends and say, "Little guitar means…" they know to respond with "PARTY!"

None of these stories have anything to do with the bands that I was seeing but they are linked to music in my mind. It's why I can say that my life revolves around music.

This is where the blog got it's name. I was thinking of all the shows I've been to, and how many times I've turned my friends and said, "Yeah, THAT just happened."

Regression

A few months back, I found myself watching my friend's band play a high school show. The stage was set up in the hallway outside the cafeteria and the auditorium. It wasn't my old high school, but it was one I had hung out in before.

I was going through a rough patch at the time. My younger sister had just gotten engaged, and announced that she was pregnant. In contrast, I had just split up with my boyfriend of 3 years. And had a series of disappointing encounters with people of the opposite sex. It was all for the best, in the end, but it didn't make me feel any less lonely.

So I stood there, waiting for my friends to take the stage, and it hit me: this was exactly what I would have been doing on a Friday night at age 15.

Had I gone nowhere in 15 years? Did it show a remarkable lack of growth that I was doing the same things at 30 that I had done when I was half that age? It was a very depressing idea at the time.

Look back now, months later, I prefer to look at it differently. Perhaps it's not that I haven't moved forward with my life. Maybe I knew myself so well back then, that I didn't have to change.

First Post!

I'm starting a blog to practice my writing, and to write about all those stories that happen outside the articles I write for the website.
I'm not counting on readers, not publishing the site... but if people come around I will be grateful.